I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
