he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize
