why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
