how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
