I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
