By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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