Heybabeimwearingurpanties
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
