Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
