Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
