I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize