So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
