I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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