another moral hangover. fuck.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Randomize
