You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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