Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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