What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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