Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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