All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
sarcasm needs its own font
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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