So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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