Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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