Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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