goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
