I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.