We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
