He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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