I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
