Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.