He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm passing your future prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
this hospital has no fireball
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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