everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
it hurts more in the daytime
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
she pinky promised me she was 18
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
