I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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