You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
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