i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
