yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
