if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize