I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
My pussy is not your playground.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize