craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
