What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
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mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
as a side note pls kill me
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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