Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
