All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
