But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
