I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize