See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
