so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize