Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Randomize
