I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
