i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
