just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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