your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
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