he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Randomize
