i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants