Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
